Just say “meow”

We often hear the staff say something like “if only cats could talk”. Of course it’s quite presumptuous (and typically human) of them to assume that we can’t. Or would wish to, when we have better methods of communicating.

Talking, after all, just leads to argument. Consider the unwise cat who simply says “give me more food”. Quite staightforward, but the human who should be providing the food is apt to argue, saying silly things like “but your dish is half full”. 1

Which leads to “but it’s half empty, you twit” and similar arguments which generally fail to educate the human and don’t contribute to the important goal of getting more food.

It’s much better not to tax their brains.

The wiser cat just says “meow” while staring at the food dish. The staff will figure it out soon enough, and be rewarded by feeling a sense of accomplishment for doing so.

Best of all they’ll be so busy patting themselves on the back for figuring out what’s needed they won’t think of arguing about the urgent need for more food.

So just meow and stare. Repeat as needed.

Of course it’s important to occasionally meow at random, or stare at a random object (or even better, nothing at all). Must keep then guessing, after all.

1 Or “the dish is bigger than it needs to be” from the one who calls himself an engineer but has never been seen driving a train.


3 Responses to “Just say “meow””

  1. I like it. Shrewd and perspicacious.

    Cokie =^..^=

  2. PepeBlackCat Says:

    You’re not only beautiful, you’re very smart too!

  3. Oh My, how brilliant my future sister in law!!! If that fails, might I suggest just jump into the half filled bowl and run like hell; this will achieve 2 objectives; 1. said humans will get up off their chair and some to investigate; they always do and 2. They will say some words under their breath but always give you a fresh bowl of kibble; hugs to you Gracie!!! Love you,

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